3M0

Evening time was just really a huge struggle for me. Partly was due to my dad's issue; partly due to the dream I had during my sleep and lastly about self adjustment. Month of september is just really the time where I had most free time and yet most troubled times too. I am struggling to find space to breathe and feeling so lethargic. Not in terms of physical but mentally.

There were many days when I am walking and working with my life battery blinking in red light. No wonder my BP was shooting up high. I tried my very best to find time to relax myself and be as comfortable as possible. Few things I enjoy to do are things like walking and talking to the Lord at the same time, listening to worship songs (no wonder buying plenty of CDs recently) and taking time to be with JL. As I was telling her that, she has done a great job and truly greatful to her for being a blessing in my life. Of course apart from saying that I also want to acknowledge that unless the Lord permit, I don't think I would have been able to enjoy this blessing.

I have slowed down quite number of things that I usually do during the weekend. Now I have the tendency to use them for personal time to rest and spend time with her. Just these few days alone, I am compelled to re-challenge myself to really spend more time in the Word and to be with the Lord rather than engaging in so many other activities. It is indeed tricky situation where I could easily caused people to think otherwise.

Just read my personal journal again, there is one part where I wrote==> The moment we know we got nothing to give... It is better to take a step back and re-connect to God again <== It was written on 14 July 2007. I am indeed intending to re-shuffle all the activities that I am holding on currently and hope to simplified them. Since coming from YMLC, the term "intimacy/spending time with the Lord/re-connect/draw near to God have been resonating quite frequently. It is a privilege that despite of being stubborn and nottie at times, but the Lord still allow me to have a hunger for Him.

So for the next three months, I guess I will cut down my activities drastically and will re-adjust myself to take more time to rest in the Lord. For this part I must confess that I am really weak in this and praying hard for strength from the Lord to help me. Secondly is to do well in my job. Thirdly is really being a good companion to JL and invest more time to understand + be of good support to each other.

Hmmm... personally I am feeling much better right now. I am sure that it is the Lord that has been keeping me held in check. Thanks to JL for being good listener,comforter and companion. Will be jumping to bed soon.

cheers.. =)